The accused? Me.
The plea? Not Guilty by reason of temporary insanity.
Yes, I’ve been watching reruns of The Practice these days. What gave me away?
Look, I know, okay? I know I haven’t been posting much these past few
days weeks months. And by much, I mean at all. But it’s not what you think. I haven’t been jet-setting around the world on whirlwind book-tours and signings and readings for my now hardly-famous-at-all book There May Be An Asterisk Involved (available in less than fifty bookstores across the country, but on most websites selling books and ebooks).
No. It’s just that I’ve been terribly busy throwing up and being tired and getting nauseous and being tired and losing sleep and being tired and let’s not forget, being tired. I’ve also been piling on the kilos, not fitting into any of my old clothes and trying to make peace with the fact that all this is considered good news.
Because wouldn’t you know, I’m preggers. Knocked up. With child. In the family way.
Kind of takes the mickey out of the creative urge, I can tell you. It’s like the body sends a ‘Go Slow, Creation Already In Progress’ signal to the brain. Which promptly slows down, kicks off its shoes and raises a tall cool glass of non-alcoholic sangria in response. You can imagine how much fun that is for a hyper-productive, performance-oriented Type A personality like me.
Which is why I couldn’t have come across Sheryl Sandberg’s epic ‘Lean In: Women, Work And The Will To Lead’ at a better time. It’s a book that makes a startling amount of sense. It talks about how women themselves slow down their own progress in the workplace. It states facts you always suspected, raises questions you’re too scared to ask yourself and in general, makes you realise you’ve been suckered for most of your life. Suckered into believing that it’s okay for a woman to give up things she wants to do because marriage, motherhood, family are all more worthwhile pursuits. As if anyone ever tells men that it’s okay to ignore their careers because spending time with family is “more fulfilling emotionally”. But this is just me paraphrasing the book awkwardly. Go pick it up and have your mind blown, whether you’re a man or a woman.
I know my decisions from here on will definitely be filtered through a more rational lens, thanks to Ms. Sandberg. Who knows, I may even post more often.
But let’s not get carried away yet. By all accounts, the next two months are going to be the best time I’ll have. After which the baby comes and I cross over to the Twilight Zone. Of sleep deprivation, chronic fatigue, irritability and the other joys of new motherhood.